Christine Alvarez is on a mission to help people live an exciting life, not only to survive but to THRIVE & be the BEST version of themselves. Today I asked her to share with us her Best Tips To Unlock The Desire For Happiness And Purpose.
Read on and enjoy! 🥰
Feel free to leave your comments below with your thoughts on her insights.
Happiness is on top of most people’s list when it comes to what they are longing in this world.
We crave it so much, hence, we spend every second of waking moment looking for it. There is a missing link that people don’t spread around much, the fact that happiness is connected with gratitude. Robin Williams spent his whole life making people laugh, yet he committed suicide. On the other side, I know a family who doesn’t really have much, yet they are the happiest people I have ever met. We can’t be happy all the time, but we can practice gratitude, and all of a sudden life is not that bad anymore. What makes people feel miserable is not the fact that they are not laughing all day, it’s the lack of purpose. Or worse, they know but do not have the courage to admit and pursue it.
My biggest fear in life is being a 80 year old, sitting in my favorite rocking chair, staring at the ocean, hearing birds chirping, and thinking to myself, “I should have pursued my passion for fitness”, or even, “I wish I had told my parents how much I loved them”.
No one likes asking hard questions that matter. We try so hard to avoid everything that causes us pain, but from my experience, understanding my pain gives me clarity of what my purpose is. I asked myself these questions, these intimidating questions that led to hard conversations with myself and those that I love.
1. What are things your heart desires?
I have heard it many times, I myself have said it a zillionth time. I want to help people. I want to have an impact on this world and so many other angelic reasons. Yes, I get that, I’m a firm believer that we are love, hence all these desires of helping others. However, I want to know your deepest desires. I grew up in Indonesia. We all know that Asian parents want their children to be a doctor or a lawyer, anything you could think of that is proven makes big bucks. I found out when I was 14 that they adopted me because my real parents didn’t want me. They told me all that drama of how close I was from being aborted. I am not against abortion whatsoever because I understand sometimes things happen. The way I see it, it was a miracle. My life is a beautiful gift that I don’t want to waste. I am so grateful for my adoptive parents, until the point I was so scared to say no to their dreams. I closed my mouth for years, but it was killing me inside. I felt stuck. “I don’t want to be a doctor, Mom, Dad”, I whispered to myself so many times. One day, I couldn’t breathe, everything was so heavy, then I realized, I wasn’t living my truth, I was living in fear. I picked up my phone, and I just poured everything out. Now, I am the happiest I have ever been to. Are you living your truth? We only got one life. One chance. No do-over. No undo button. No “Oops, can I try one more time?”. It’s such a waste if we only live a mediocre life. I want PASSION. I want FIRE. I want to live a LEGACY. And I want that for you, too. Give it a try, it might surprise you.
2. Do you really love yourself?
It’s so easy to scream self-love on social media. You can post a selfie with your brightest smile and with the caption, “I love myself”. But do you really love yourself? I want to analyze something beyond your posts, yes, your inner voice. “I can’t do that”, “Who am I, thinking that I can get 1 million followers?”, “Why am I such quitter?”, “I feel ugly today”, “But, what If I messed up?”. Sounds familiar? The meanest person you have in your life is probably yourself, and it’s time to make peace with her. I want to share something personal to help me illustrate this. I started this personal development journey 4 months ago, when I finally said to myself, “Enough is enough, stop playing a victim. Sure, bad things happened to you. But staying in this position is your choice, Christine.”. I started listening to self-development books and podcasts. I even started posting videos about “self-love”. Little did my audience know, I still hated myself. I told myself the worst thing you could think of. I’m embarrassed to admit this, but I also still hurt myself. I had no idea where I got this habit, but every time I feel pain, I channeled it into physical things, I slapped myself, I pressed my nails against my skin until it leaves a mark. Then, I snapped, “This is not loving. You don’t love yourself.”. I cried and cried, then I did something for the first time. “I’m sorry for hurting you”, I whispered to myself. I cried even more. Guess what? I haven’t done things and said those hurtful things to myself ever since. Sometimes, all we need is forgiveness. I don’t know what mean things you do to yourself, it could be different from mine, but I still want you to take time to tell the truth and fix it once and for all.
3. Whose opinions matter to me and why?
Have you ever heard people saying, “Do you, boo. Don’t worry about what people think of you.”. But I think deep inside, there is at least someone whose opinions you value. It’s crippling us because we haven’t had the bravery to admit that just yet. Why knowing this important? It’s stopping you from being the best version of yourself. You are still trying to please that person and live up to their standards, not yours. We were so carefree as little kids. We had no idea there were such things as “too outspoken”, “too shy”, “attention seeker”, and so on. Then, as we grew up, we learned about all these standards, what we can be and what we can’t be. There is always one thing that’s wrong about you based on what society have told us. Knowing this opened my eyes and I hope it will open your eyes too. Skinny? They told us that we have an eating disorder. Curvy? They told us that we are being irresponsible that we don’t take care of our body. Tall? They told us guys will be intimidated to date you. Short? They told us that we are not “model materials”. Get it? It’s never enough. Everyone has insecurities. BUT, what matters is how we handle it. Is it consuming us so much that it has blinded us to see how beautiful this life is?
A purpose driven life will always inspire you to wake up in the morning. You might not be happy 24/7, but you will have more peace in this life. Let’s live an exciting life, not only to survive but to thrive.
After you have decided what you truly want, you would be surprised how fast everything is rearranged towards your goal. Your life might seem like chaos for one second, do not worry, it just means things that aren’t serving your purpose are being removed from your life. And being replaced with something that will serve your higher purpose.
You can connect (and should ;) with Christine via her Insta @christiinealvarez where she talks about fitness, mindset, self-love, the law of attraction, forgiveness and much more. Get inspired!